Balancing Act: The Newsletter (No. 155, July 2012 )
Follow me on Twitter! You can find me here:
And find me on Facebook:
Techniques for balance: Beginnings of sentences that immediately irritate me
And: Any time your kid is far from home, the wife picks up the phone, and hears, "Put Dad on the line…."
Jim Furyk did his level best not to lose the U.S. Open Golf Championship, and he wound up doing exactly that: losing it. That's because he didn't try to win it, merely not to lose it when he had the lead.
The human condition: Fear of rejectionMy wife has a "safe list" of women I'm allowed to take with me to events or dinners when my wife is out of town or otherwise unavailable and an escort is required. (I'm also allowed to become romantically involved with Michelle Pfeiffer or Sophia Vergara if the opportunity should present itself, but that's another story.)
On one occasion I took one of these attractive, professional women to dinner, and she talked non-stop for 90 minutes—about herself. She was a lot less attractive by dessert, and almost repellant over coffee. The media seems to dote on a narrow dimension of physical attractiveness with the exception of overwhelming talent, such as Oprah Winfrey or Danny DiVito.
I find that truly attractive ("pleasing or appealing to the senses") people are those who are enthusiastic, well-groomed, stylish, friendly, and interested in others. The difference in airline flight attendant attractiveness is not a function of how they look in uniform, but rather whether they greet you cordially, smile, provide help when requested, and make small talk while working.
I flew for 13 hours next to Dolly Parton one day en route to Sydney, and she was so charming that you fell in love with her. I asked her road manager if she were like this consistently, and he said, "That is Dolly." She asked a ton of questions about my work, rarely mentioned her own, and had no airs of celebrity at all. We walked off the plane together into a bevy of photographers and I told her, "I apologize, this always happens when I arrive here." She punched my arm and walked off to an interview.
All of us can be more attractive to others if we care to be, and if we step outside the confines of the arbitrary physical characteristics that the media portray (which often prompt me to think, "That person needs a solid meal."). Don't bemoan the way you were born, start working on the way you interact.
(I showed up at a charity event in a Newport mansion with one of the "safe" women. The executive director told the registrar, a friend of my wife, "Mr. Weiss has arrived." The registrar looked up and proclaimed loudly, "And that is NOT Mrs. Weiss!")
And this terrific session authorized by Alan:
People are about to gather in my suite in London for a light breakfast before we begin my Shameless Promotion Workshop. I find that one of my floor-to-ceiling windows, leading onto the balcony, had been left open by the cleaning crew, propped open by a towel. I remove the prop and close the window before people arrive.
Copyright 2011 Alan Weiss. All rights reserved.
Balancing Act® is our registered trademark. You are encouraged to share the contents with others with appropriate attribution. Please use the ® whenever the phrase "Balancing Act" is used in connection with this newsletter or our workshops.
Having problems viewing this email, click